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User blog:Formaliin/Translation: 2009's April Fool (Kohinata-tei no Bansan)
Translation is done by the Wonderful Miss Houroumusume. April Fool 2009 is a section that can be found in the junk room (ガラクタ置き場). It's currently inaccessible, however the plot and conversation is later adapted to the game Kohinata-tei no Bansan. You are standing in front of a house you’ve never seen before. A man who seems to own the house looks to you and says, Kohinata: “…Welcome.” You realise you’re holding something in your right hand and when you look down, you’re clutching a card you’ve never seen before. The man sees the card and smiles. Kohinata: I see you have an invitation. Welcome… to my house. I’ve been waiting for you. You: (Who is this man? Why am I here…?) Kohinata: Hahaha, don’t be so cautious. I’ve already made all the preparations to entertain you. It’s cold out here. Quickly, come inside. *…Go inside (continue) *…Run away! (leave) You: …Pardon the intrusion. Inside the mansion. It’s decorated with balustrades, pillars and other elegant ornamentation. Although it’s dim, the entire place gives off an air of sophistication. You follow the man who had invited you into the entrance way, and he shows you to a location that looks like a dining room. The table is set for several people and you can see many extravagant dishes lined up along the length of it. Kohinata: Come in. Choose whichever chair you like. I’ll make us some tea… Oh, You can eat the food that’s been set out here if you want, I don’t mind. You: I couldn’t accept such wonderful fare… Kohinata: Go for it, cooking’s kind of like a hobby of mine. If you don’t eat it, it will just end up in the trash. You wouldn’t let that happen, right? …Oops, I almost forgot. I have to make the tea first… And so, help yourself. You: (He’s gone to the other side of the room. Now, what should I do…?) *Eat *Wait without eating *Leave You:…Okay then You’re starving and so you stretch your hand out to the fruit sitting next to you. Then you put it in your mouth… It’s more delicious than you expected. In a daze you reach for the soup, chicken, cake… Kohinata: I’m glad you like it. Here’s you tea. It’s still hot so be careful. You: Th- Thank you… The tea he’s poured you smells delicious and when you drink it you somehow feel better. And then... *…Talk? (…Talk?) The next thing you know you’re in a dark room. The man and the food isn’t there. Mafuyu: …You shouldn’t have eaten that food… It was a mistake to come here at all… You: Who are you…? Mafuyu: …You might still… have time. Go back to the world you came from… The world you’re supposed to be in… …You lose consciousness… END. (…The phone is still ringing) You look around and there’s an old-fashioned, black phone’s bell ringing in the corner of the room. You wait but the bell doesn’t stop ringing, and that man doesn’t return. You timidly pick up the phone’s receiver. Kori: …Hello, Naru-chan!?... It’s about time you picked up… I was really worried…! Where are you right now? Hey, where are you!? You: S- Sorry. Maybe Naru-chan was that other man…? He’s not here right now… Kori: …Who are you? Why are you answering Naru-chan’s mobile? …But Naru-chan is alive? He got away from Kohinata’s house…!? You: H- Hold up a second. I don’t really know who “Naru-chan” is or where I am… (But this isn’t a mobile… What does this all mean?) Kori: What? What!? You don’t make much sense. But mobiles don’t work at Kohinata’s house, So the fact you picked up must mean you’re in a safe place. You: Wait. What is Kohinata’s house…? Kori: Kohinata is the worst of the worst, he puts his guests to sleep with his food and locks them up in weird rooms. It happened to me too… He sent me to sleep and that’s how I was separated from Naru-chan, But I saw my chance and I managed to escape… Oh, I’m not of time! The girl says she’ll call again and hangs up. …But… did she say he puts people to sleep with food? Then could this house be “Kohinata”’s house…? A phone call that should have gone to a mobile coming to this black phone, what on earth is this house…? *Follow after him *Leave Alice: I don’t want to be in “Wonderland” anymore…! You: …E- Excuse me… I’m sorry. I’m looking for someone… Alice: …What a coincidence. I’m looking for my big sister too. I’m Alice. Which story did he take you from? You:…Story? Um, what do you mean? Alice: …Oh, are you a “not yet” person? Don’t take this the wrong way, but forget about the person you’re searching for and leave this house as soon as you can. Having said this, Alice turns away and doesn’t look back at you again. Why would she be searching for someone inside a person’s house? You have a thousand questions, but Alice shows no sign of speaking to you again and so you drop your shoulders and leave the kitchen. *You want to speak to that man (…There’s a door on the right) You push the door to your right and peek inside. Inside the room are bookcases lined up in a row, and sitting below them is a boy. He notices you and rushes over. Tetsuro: What!? You’re not Kohinata-sensei! Hey, hey, how did you get here!? You: …Kohinata… How did I get here? …What do you mean? Tetsuro: Well, I’ve never gotten out of here, And I’ve never seen anyone besides Kohinata-sensei? Oh, hey, hey, forget that! Read this book! The boy is smiling innocently… What should you do? You want to know more, but you also feel like you shouldn’t be talking to this boy… *Read the red book *Read the green book *Ask him more questions You: Okay, just for a little while? I’ll read you the green book. You open the green book. At that moment a bright light shoots at you and you close your eyes reflexively. Tetsuro: Ahaha! You fell for it~♪ Bye bye! Maybe we’ll meet again, somewhere! You: Wh- What…!? What happened…!? The boy’s happy voice fades away and the next time you open your eyes you’re standing in a forest you’ve never seen before. The boy from before is nowhere to be seen, and green stretches out all around you as far as you can see. God of the Forest: Hehehe. Unfortunately there are enough people in this world already. You’re not wanted here. (Uh, there’s someone behind me. A strange boy with white hair. He’s not wearing any shoes or socks, but he’s not dirty in the slightest…) God of the Forest: So, what do you want to do now? I’m the god of the forest. I will grant… You a wish. What if he really can grant your wish? Then it’s obvious what you’ll ask for… *I want to do it all over again… (repeat) *I want to see more of this world… (To Iro-Aseta Tegami) *I want to go back to my world…! (leave) You: Okay, just for a little while? I’ll read you the red book. You open the red book. At that moment a bright light shoots at you and you close your eyes reflexively. Tetsuro: Ahaha! You fell for it~♪ Bye bye! Maybe we’ll meet again, somewhere! You: Wh- What…!? What happened…!? The boy’s happy voice fades away and the next time you open your eyes you’re standing in a city you’ve never seen before. The sky is a cloudy, leaden grey and while tall buildings shoot up into the sky everywhere like any other city, it’s very quiet and you can’t see any people. Hiro: Oh… Someone’s here. What’s wrong? It’s not safe for you to be here. You: (Uh, there’s someone behind me. A slender, beautiful person. I can’t really tell if they’re a man or woman…) Hiro: Don’t you know your way back? I only know how to be violent… That’s a problem, isn’t it? But if you want to avoid some painful memories, you’d better run away quickly. He (or she) is holding… a knife. You run away. You run through the town and when you see the X-crossing in front of the station you find another figure. You take cover and wait to see what the figure does… *Go after the figure (To Kimi Hitori (novel)) *Listen carefully (To Kimi Hitori (song)) You: You’ve never left here… What do you mean? What is that man…? Tetsuro: Huh? The door can’t be opened from inside. But Kohinata-sensei’s a good person, he looks after me! You: So he’s imprisoned you here? I don’t think that’s something a good person would do… Tetsuro: There’s a lot of dangerous things outside, Sensei protects me. Are you going to live here too now? Or… Are you going into today’s soup? Kidding… Ahahahaha! You’re creeped out by the innocently laughing boy. What have you gotten yourself involved with…? *Try to open the door *Talk more to the boy You: How long have you been here? Tetsuro: When I came to I was here. I don’t really remember before that… But I can read my favourite books here every day, so I like it! The endings change every time I read them. What does that mean…? Tetsuro: Oh… Kohinata-sensei! When you whirl around, that man is standing there. He’s smiling but his eyes are cold and steely. Kohinata: This is a problem… I can’t have you walking about freely in my house. It would seem you’re not suitable for this “story”. Now… What shall we have for dinner tonight? The moment he says that, you’re hit by a strong attack from behind. You fall down where you are without a clue to what attacked you. …You lose consciousness… END. You try to open the door to the room. When you do, despite what you had predicted, the door opens easily. The door opened? Tetsuro: Wow, that’s amazing! I couldn’t open it… I bet there’s somewhere else you have to go. You: Why don’t you leave here with me? This house is kind of… strange. Tetsuro: No thanks. Right now… There’s nowhere else I want to go. See you, take care. Bye bye. You feel a bit awkward leaving the smiling boy here… But that’s what he wanted, so there’s not much you can do about it. You leave that room. *You want to speak to that man (…There’s a door to your left) You open the door on your left. It’s pitch black inside and it takes your eyes a while to adjust, but once they have it seems to be a dreary… square, concrete-walled room. And there’s a woman… collapsed on the floor. You: …A- Are you okay!? … You: …!? I- Is she dead…!? The woman’s body is cold to the touch. You’re shocked and jump backwards, bumping into something behind you. *…A girl? *…A boy? *…The wall? Little Red Hood: So Kohinata caught you too… You: Caught? I came here myself… Who are you? What happened to this woman…? What is going on in this house? Little Red Hood: I’m Little Red Riding Hood. I live in the fairy-tale world. And unfortunately I don’t have time to answer your questions. Kohinata… will be here soon. You hear a door open behind you. When you turn around, that man is standing there. You: …What on earth has happened? What are you doing in this house…? Kohinata: That’s not something you need to know. You needn’t worry, you’re not going to die. Just live forever. …Not here of course, in the story…! Little Red Hood: …Watch out! The moment he brings his hand towards you, the girl thrusts you away. Then she turns her palm towards the man. Little Red Hood: I won’t let you get away with this any longer… Give us back our world…! Then a bright light is released from her hand. The pure white light blinds you, and you hear her speak. Little Red Hood: I’m returning you to your world now. I’m sorry… You got dragged into all this… …Then your body is swallowed up by the warm light… END Hinta: What enjoyment do you get out of this!? Kohinata! You: …Eh…? You look to where he’s looking and there’s that man. Kohinata: My hobby is reading, Hinta-kun. But no matter which story I pick up, It always ends the same way. …That’s why I’ve put “living characters” in the stories, so that the endings will change. Hinta: You’re killing people for your own amusement…!? Kohinata: I’m not killing them, they’re “living” inside the stories. Though… It is for my amusement. It’s not all bad for the woman lying over there and you, who’s in this world in exchange, right? Hinta: This world is still fresh and fun for me? Idiot…! I was happy enough in that other world. …I belonged there…! After looking at you, the boy called Hinta holds out his hand to you. Hinta: Take my hand… And then close your eyes. It’s up to me now… I’ll take you back to your world. …I’m sorry you got involved in this. Then everything in front of you goes pure white. You can’t see or hear anything. …Then your body is swallowed up by the warm light… END You: Whoa!? …What’s that, a wall…? There is indeed a wall over there. You jump around to look towards the voice, and there’s the man. You try to be as composed as you can as you question him. You: …Are you going to kill me like you killed her? Kohinata: I didn’t kill her. She’s just living in the story world, not this world, now. Maybe you saw the bookcases in the room next to this one? That woman is now living inside one of the books in that room. She’s definitely not dead. You: …And I suppose you’re not doing that cruel thing for your own amusement? Kohinata: …? What are you talking… Tetsuro: Kohinata-sensei… The owner of the voice is the boy who’s come through the door. He finds the person he’d called “Kohinata-sensei” straight away. Kohinata: H- How… did you get in here…? Tetsuro: I figured out how to open the door. Hey, Sensei, it’s okay now. I…. I want to see outside this world… I want to live… Kohinata: … Tetsuro: The stories were really interesting. But… I can’t know the smell of flowers or the warmth of people from picture books. Maybe I’ll try to feel something and be hurt… But I want to know what that pain feels like. …I want to repay… your kindness, Kohinata-sensei. You don’t understand his situation at all. But you vaguely comprehend that “Kohinata-sensei” has chosen the wrong way to protect this boy. Tetsuro: …Kohinata-sensei, do you know? Outside it’s spring now and the flowers are very beautiful. …Do you have a favourite flower? Me? I like tulips! There are lots of colours of tulips all over the world. I’ve only seen them in picture books, but they were really pretty. Let’s go see them together, Kohinata-sensei…! Kohinata stays silent for some time, but finally smiles and looks at you. You stand ready but his smile is much kinder than before. Kohinata: Thanks to you, the ending to “this story” has changed greatly. But… I suppose this kind of ending isn’t so bad every now and again. …Thank you, I enjoyed this. So I return you to your own world, I’ll return you all. To the worlds that really need you. Having said this, a blue door appeared beside Kohinata. He opens the door, turns towards you and bows. Kohinata: Thank you for being part of my story. I hope your path leads you to happiness. You nod and after glancing at the two of them You say goodbye to this story. And then… *Go through the blue door (return to index) *Go see the tulips (To the song Tulips) END Category:Blog posts Category:Translation